Yes New Friends

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Yes New Friends.

By Lauren Wundrock

Drake said it, and for at least a whole 3 month span in 2013 he had you saying it too: “No new friends, no new friends, no new friends no, no, no!” And if you tell me you didn’t sing that in your head, write me back and I’ll give you a dollar.

Champagne Papi’s sentiments here are pretty much saying don’t switch up; don’t trust anyone that you haven’t been rocking with from way back; he’s good with his day-ones and doesn’t really feel the need to make more friends at this point in his life.

I resonate with these lyrics most when someone I thought I could trust proves otherwise. That kind of disappointment has me feeling like screw it, I only need my besties from childhood. Those champs saw me through the ugly years—I don’t need anyone else!

And beyond that, making new friends, particularly as an adult, is really hard. I don’t think I need to go into detail on that, you know what I mean. Drake does, too.

But, in reality, and I’m sorry Drizzy…thank goodness for new friends. As someone who moved to New York by myself looking to develop my career as a creative, I left all of my day-ones back home. And for as many people that live in this city, it sure has a way of making you feel isolated.

If it wasn’t for the new friends in my life—Traye being my wingwoman, Josef cooking for me because he knows I can’t, Maggie letting me play with her dog, Carlos politely challenging my wardrobe—I wouldn’t have stayed.

I’m learning how to be a better judge of character, and how to discern which new friendships are worth developing. Certainly, it’s not all of them—but certainly still, it’s necessary. Especially as a creative.

Collaboration is the nature of creation.

To continue the Drake references, “Views” had something like 71 contributors.  It was a hugely successful album because of them. And although I wasn’t there as one of his writers (yet), I am pretty sure he had some “new friends” on the team. Our friends are our life’s collaborators. The more we experience and the farther we go, so expands our creative potentials. Our friends, our collaborators, directly influence the degree to which we expand.

Don’t close yourself off to the people around you. Making new friends does not mean losing your old ones. As always, practice selectivity when choosing any of your collaborators. Share a vision. Care about the same stuff. Hold each other down. Day-ones, “you’re stuck with me dawg” and shout out to all my #NewFriends for reminding me I’m still worthy of love.

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